Tolerance: Not Just a Black and White Issue

We often hear long discussions on how as Americans we must be tolerant of others who are different. Public schools, government institutions, colleges, newspapers and many businesses spend small fortunes in tolerance training. I thought about this today as we sat in a fast food restaraunt with our youngest son with his newest, loud, verbal tick that sounds like a pre-historic cat trying to cough-up a furball. At what point do we go too far with our expectations of tolerance?

Is it right for us to expect others to just accept our son's disruptive behavior in public? Should we become incensed when people glare in our direction because of his constantly annoying sounds while they attempt to enjoy their lunch breaks? The advocates of political correctness would insist that everyone else pretend that our son was perfectly normal. They would campaign to get everyone in the country to treat children with autism in the same manner that nuerologically typical children are treated in public. But where do we draw the line?

Obviously it would be wrong to treat people different because of their skin color, right? Or is it? I don't treat my Hispanic friends or Arab friends or Asian friends in the same manner that I would treat my Anglo friends. And with good reason...my Arab friends would be insulted if I invited them into my house and said, "Make yourself at home and grab yourself something to eat." Arabs take pride in being good hosts. I would not go into my living room alone with an Arab female. That is completely contrary to their culture. At the same time, I don't try to act like I am an Arab myself. I simply choose to try and understand their culture and relate to them in a manner that compliments that. The Apostle Paul understood this when he said he was a Roman to the Romans, a Jew to the Jews and a Greek to the Greeks.

So rather than base how we live and act on the views of the political correct society, we should live based on God's love for everyone. Instead of ignoring someone with Down's Syndrome for fear of embarassing them, we should recognize them and show an interest in them. Most Down's Syndrome individuals love to hug and receive hugs. Instead of avoiding smokers as if they have the plague (something I tend to do because of allergies) we should include them in our small groups. You can still pray quietly that God will help them break the addiction. Instead of frowning at children that appear to be ill-behaved, we should see if we can help that tired, irritable mother who feels her only option is to yell her children into submission.

Most of us are not intolerant because we dislike or disagree with another persons way of life, but rather because how they look or behave makes us feel uncomfortable. Sometimes it is wise to avoid people (examples: you should not bring a child molestor around your children or hang around people doing something illegal just to be a good example to them). But we also need to realize that sometimes it is wise to avoid infringing on others freedoms (allowing a crying baby to disrupt a service or movie, smoking in non-smoking areas or expecting others to be tolerant of your ticking child when you know the verbal noises are annoying). Tolerance is a two-way street and as Christians we need to be the ones with our eyes open, looking for ways to bridge the divides.