Mental Musings

Many people put an expectation into the holidays that is far beyond anything reasonable. Nothing can stand up to their idea of a perfect holiday. And when the day is not as they had hoped, they begin to crash emotionally. For others the holiday was difficult because they were not able to spend it with their loved ones. Either because of their work (military, missionaries, medical personnel, law enforcement, etc.) or because a loved one passed away during the year. All of their holiday cheer was drained away by the feeling of loss. Some people spend too much on the holiday and the realization of what they have done hits home when they notice how empty that bank account has become. The financial stress is put off during the buildup to the holiday, but after all of the festivities they have no other distractions to prevent them from focusing on the pending payday shortfall. Then there are those who physically lost control during the holidays. The food and drinks were passed

After 14 years of studying music and 32 years of being paid as a musician, I am coming to the end of my music career. This decision has been something I have struggled with for almost 3 years. And now, as I come to the end, the emotional strain seems to be no less difficult. About 6 years ago I was diagnosed with asthma after a couple years of continuing respiratory illnesses. Even if I felt fine, I noticed that there was physical pain when I played my trumpet. I also would become exhausted after leading the three morning worship services. This exhaustion would last for days just in time for me to begin rehearsals for the next Sunday's services. Those would leave me physically spent as well and I would generally recover just in time for Sunday mornings. It took the doctors more than a year to diagnose me because the spirometer tests showed that I was breathing at about 90-95% of capacity, which is normal. But I knew that the tightness in my lungs and the exhaustion was